Uncool Randy dot com
DEEP THOTS WITH uNCOOL RANDY (BLOG)
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08/27/2024 (3:57 AM)
Get your canceling stamp out: "Bourbon isn't a food ingredient." - Uncool Randy
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06/18/2024 (3:57 PM)
Coined a phrase today: "opposite sorry". It's basically "sorry not sorry" but not played out.
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05/31/2024 (7:47 PM)
Muppet Babies, we make our dreams come true
Muppet Babies, we'll do the same for you
...Yeah, sounds nice, but who's got the time these days!?
UPDATE (7:59pm)
The Muppet Babies live in the same house and share the same nanny. So they're all siblings? Piggy & Kermit too!?
...nice.
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05/06/2024 (8:31 PM)
Did you know that before Elvis was Elvis - he was an Elvis impersonator?
Also, fun fact, the Louisville area code of "502" is the final area code mentioned in the Luda song "Area Codes" in which Luda lists the area codes in which he has hos.
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02/21/2024 (4:35 PM)
You wanna talk ketchup types? It goes like this:
1. Brickman's Fancy Ketchup - 16 oz bottle.
2. McDonald's ketchup PACKET
3. Brickman's Fancy Ketchup - 20 oz bottle
4. Heinz ketchup PACKET manufactured for White Castle
5. McDonald's ketchup that goes on the sandwiches.
6. Any restaurant ketchup that comes in a metal ramekin.
7. Glass bottle Heinz -opened 30 minutes ago
8. Grocery store squeeze bottle Heinz
There's your gosh damn hot take...Don't agree? Better hot take your ass back to Ketchup 101 class. Yeah, you better...better go back to the applause line store and ask for a refund because their due diligence department's asleep at the wheel.
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11/7/2023 (5:05 PM)
Ohhhh the power of voting! Rock the vote! During a particularly boring and pointless civics class lesson, ninth grade me once said: "more like civic doody, am I right?" Now I'm not much for lesson learning, so I'm saying it a bunch more today. I said it right before I walked out the door to go vote and then I yelled it pretty loudly when I walked into the voting lair. And just like way back then, when I first thought of that masterful wordplay, today I again found myself again at a school, inside a room that I don't even have a class in, standing around waiting on a principal I've lost all respect for. Also I think I filled out my scantron wrong. Circle of life, right?
Also could you make the collection bin for the voting ballots look any more like a trash can? Talk about the pot calling the kettle apathetic.
xoxo===)
-UCR
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10/7/2023 (wee hours of the morning)
What's up little buddies? I've never read a blog before in my life and I'm not about to start now. I'll write some sort of blog here, but I'll be damned if I read it.
Now, I don't wanna geezer out or nothin', but the blog and the facebook, those sound like the same thing to me. I guess the difference is that with a blog, you have to actually choose to find and click the blog to read it. Whereas on the Facebook, ol' Zucchercorn sits up there in his ivory nerd's chair and he picks out who's words you see for you. Then he picks out who sees your words.
And that's the way we like it! Also, that's the way we hate it. Yeah! We hate it and that's why we're gonna go find a blog to read! Give us the yuppy we don't know. You know? That's what the people will say! That's while I'll add a blog section to what is clearly a cheap template-based website! That's why I'll type way more letters than there ever will be eyeballs upon them. Yes. That's why I'll do what I'm doing and...
Start a blog.
xoxo===)
-UCR
